
I've been driving used cars since then...I've been toolin' around in an '80 VW rabbit diesel since '85. It is on it's second engine and has gone over 150,000 miles on the body and chassis. It's starting to rust and the passenger door won't close without my getting a screwdriver out and going outside to push a hook out of the way. They want obscene amounts of money for a new door lock system. So I suffered.
The stupid car gets 56 miles to the gallon but, it needs new shocks, new brakes and it's rusting...so it's now a beach car....I bet that a lot of you can relate to that huh?
Since I started this site and this venture, I decided it was time to spruce up appearances just a bit, so folks don't think I'm a complete nut. Besides, I don't feel safe with the family in the rabbit on the highway.....( here you'll notice the beginnings of the parade of "I need a new car rationalizations"....I'm sure they'll sound familiar, so I'll spare you) whatever.
The new car is a Honda.
I tried shopping around. I went downtown to a few dealers. I went to the one on Ala Moana Boulevard that begins with the letter "P" and had every sales game I have ever heard of, tried on me. They simply wanted too much for the car.
I had a lot of fun with the "Closer", the guy in the little room....it was like verbal arm wrestling. He pulled all of the usual stuff..."We might not have this color again for two years!"...."It's the only car on the lot without electric doorlocks."..."Yeah, yeah, yeah," I thought, and "I'll get chosen for the next moon mission, I am sure."
Then he got downright ugly and insulting. I hadn't signed anything yet, he was struggling for air, and he was gettin' pissed. I was winning and he got nasty and started making innuendos about manhood, and started using some other terribly "motivating" phraseology...so I sat forward in my sleek vinyl chair, looked him dead in the eye and said "Fine," and then offered him a favorite verb and pronoun (usually associated with a hand signal), and stood up.
I could hear him wheezing an asthmatic moan as I opened the "Closing Room" door and walked out.
"Ok, now we'll try the guys over the hill," I thought to myself. I got in the old battered hulk, cranked her to life and rattled and rolled back over the Pali.
I was almost tempted to go out that night for more fun and frolic with car guys but, thought better of it and went home, had a beer and watched Hawai'i Five-O reruns instead. Yes, it was another exciting Friday night!
The next morning I got up early, did a bunch of errands and went looking again, this time, over on my side of the Pali.
Shock of all shocks, the folks at the TV Commercial dealership were mellow.
Nobody pounced.
The guy I talked with let me test drive a couple of cars. I tried a Civic and an Accord. The Civic had trouble getting up a small hill on the H3. The Accord screamed and could get me in a lot of trouble fast! In the Accord, I discovered that:
A) I could fit in it, and
B) it even has more leg room than I need! Seriously, I actually have the seat set back on the second to the last notch on the track, and I am really almost too comfortable! (No easy trick, as I'm six-four)
We talk story, we talk price...(I'm numb ever since I saw this basic model price out at $14,999.00 without radio or AC) and I go ahead and add an Air Conditioner and an extra warranty plan AND an alarm...
Now, with dealer prep, tax and license, my basic little car is up to $19,000 something...
"OK, so I'm on the five year plan like everyone else." ...."Hondas are great everyone says." Confirmation rationales start to richochet off the inside of my skull...I can feel them bouncing off the inside walls!
We then go on in and sit down in a little cubicle.
My salesman tries a couple of closes but, I am still resisting. We talk options. He mentions that a car like that one without electric everything is real rare.
"I really don't want electric doors and windows. All that stuff goes on the fritz when rain gets in there. Each door panel is about $400 bucks. I'm saving money", I think.
I suggest a deposit to hold the car. He tells me it has to be for the full amount. I chuckle and suggest a grand and then he runs into the shuttered glass office to see if he can hold the car with a refundable deposit until Monday so I can chew on it. I tap my fingers on the little desk...
He comes out smiling...It's a deal!...He can hold it...and then I just smiled and heard myself say something like..."Ah what the heck, go ahead and prep it, I'll write you a down payment check and come pick it up later this afternoon."
Just like in an early Flinstone's cartoon, the "Yabba Dabba Doo" feet scrambled around me, the cartoon dust clouds spun around and around. I just sat there and smiled the "I just bought a new car and I hope I can really pay for it" smile inwardly to myself.
Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit. Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit. <---(Time advancing like a Saturday Night Live dream sequence).
The car took longer to prep than I had originally been told. I got a friend to drive me down and it's dark. It's six instead of four. We go over the car like a couple of FBI agents. I am not leaving the lot with any "Midnight Special". My buddy Paul, the Port Engineer, the guy who fixes four story tall diesel ship engines, is with me to make sure I don't get second rate goods. I feel secure...and it's raining.
It's pouring.
The car is gleaming and dry under a garage roof. The Rasta detail dudes are wipin' her gently with chamois' and fluffy Holiday Inn towels
My salesman is doin' the delivery dance..showing me the keys and the doo-dads and the knobs and the gas cap latch, the trunk latch and the h'...h' ...hood latch..(it doesn't open the hood). His smile vaporizes. The little presentation show has just been scuttled.
We have a
My friend also finds a small dent...just a teeney weeny dent. OK, it's a dimple I call it...looks like a production thing...close to a seam...I decide I can live with it but, now the hood doesn't close. My friend, who is a major mechanical engineer type, pokes around and discovers the defect AND how to manually get it to work enough to close the hood. The salesman says something like, "Don't open the hood, we'll fix it,"..and runs off somewhere.
My friend and I pour over every pore of that car and we decide it's ok...He walks around it with my flashlight beam riding the paint job. Paul says to me, knowledgeably, "The hood latch can be replaced. Accept delivery."
I concur.
The salesguy returns. "We're gonna have to fly one in...we'll call you," he says and off I go...into the night, and into the rain. My new Honda n' me....
The car is a gas! It runs great and corners good and why, without the diesel engine jammin', I can hear myself think again. It smells good...yeah, all new ones do, don't they?
Two days later the AC blows hot air at me. I take it in. They give me a loaner car. I also remark that there were no rear mudflaps. How much I ask? Fifty bucks, I am told. I tell him to put 'em on. I zoom away in a loaner with a sunroof and electric everything!
Several hours later I get a page and go get the car...The AC is fixed. According to the salesguy, the manager was so pissed about the hood latch that they tore one out of another new car and put it in my car. The mudflaps were always supposed to be on the car, they had been overlooked at prep, so I kept the fifty bucks.
Then I noticed the chunk of paint missing over near the hood of my car along the edge. Looked exactly like someone had dropped a screwdriver on my car.
I Point it out.
They are embarrassed, sorta shocked and promise to take care of it next time it's in which should be for license plate pick-up...they have to order touch-up paint, so off I go. So far so good, all things considered.
Almost a week goes by. The car is making me a kindler gentler person. I am happy and can hear myself think when I drive.
with the new automatic transmission and AC...and then....as the odometer is about to register 850 miles, the car starts feeling like it's gonna stall.
I go to work anyhow.
I buzz around town.
It feels like it's gonna stall so I turn on the AC...it runs better.
"It's just my imagination," I tell myself.
Then it does it again. I turn off the AC...it runs better. I rev the engine and then remember it's fuel injection and I decide that revving is meaningless.
I get home ok but, it's still runnin' weird.
Well, no idle screw adjustment with these babies. They are all fuel injection so, I take it in. I don't want to be stalling out on the H1 and get rear-ended by an overzealous commuter. Then I'd really have an enormous problem on my hands.
The mechanics swarmed all over the car. First they ask me if I had sprayed huge amounts of water all over the engine. I assured them that no, I only clean the outside of the car, not the engine...They huddled some more.
They say it's gonna take a while, so I zoom off in another all electric, late model trade-in loaner car.
Several hours go by and then I got a page. I called in and the gal on the phone said that my car problem was due to a bad fuel injector. They had determined that that was indeed the problem.
Unfortunately, she went on, this created a new problem: they did not have a fuel injector in stock, as the car is sooo new and no one ever thought this would ever happen on a brand new car. "We're gonna fly one in!"
Two days later, I got another page..."It's valves," she said, "keep the other car for the weekend."
Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit. Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit.
Today I got another page at around five. "Your car is fixed!"
So, I drove home and unloaded all my stuff into the garage. I then loaded up the papers for my car and a flashlight for the glovebox and then I hosed down their car.
I thought it only courteous. It's a black one and it had been rainy for the past couple of days, so I blew the majority of the road dirt off with the hose, got in and drove back to the dealership.
I parked, got out, turned in their keys, picked up mine, accepted a copy of a receipt that said N/C (for no charge) next to about twelve things listed there with huge part numbers and stuff and walked out to my car.
Pleasantly, enough, they had washed it down. "That must explain why the driver's windshield wiper is saluting me in the extended position," I thought to myself. I put the wiper down, the papers and flashlight in the glovebox and decided to "go over" the car.
Then I saw .
It was almost yelling at me!!!
On the top of the bumper there was a chunk of color missing. I wiped my eyes just to make sure, and then "zoomed in". Yep, looked like someone had dropped a screwdriver on my bumper and it had torn a little hole in the protective covering of my formerly "virginal" new car bumper.
My blood pressure shot up about 800 points and I walked in and saw the dealership's Finance Manager walking outside timidly.
Perhaps I was wearing that "annoyed look".
I stopped him cold and asked him to follow me outside....
Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit. Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit.
I'm sorry but, I wasn't the nicest guy at that point. I never raised my voice. I spoke clearly and with such great enunciation that Henrietta MacAfee Korth, my old 8th Grade English Teacher would've been beaming at me from across the room with astonishment and pride!
...and I do remember using a couple of those "verbs" again, and I also heard myself say something meaningful about not paying $19,000 on a car everyday...blah blah blah....
Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit. Diddle diddle diddle diddle dit.
Now, I'm home and I have a piece of paper that says they owe me a new bumper. I "asked" for one and interestingly enough, they say that they're gonna get me one. The Finance Manager muttered something about a few seconds of sloppy work and now it's a major repair for them but, I offered no condolences.
Now, I have to call some Parts Manager guy tomorrow and make sure he orders it.
I still have to go see them for license plates.
I am there too often.
I am a bit angry.
Yes, sorry Honda but, that you want me to send in.
Oh, and one more thing Mr. Honda....even though you did build this car in Marysville, Ohio with American workers and even though I purchased it at an American dealership....
and I'll keep ya posted.
Rabbett

Well, well, well...they actually did change the bumper. They actually did pull one off of another new car and put it on mine.
Tomorrow, they are actually gonna have another tiny ding fixed ( I failed to see it the other day and they owned up to it quite readily)...I also inquired, "How much will it cost me to put some more side body molding on here...as I sorta need to protect myself against you guys?"
"No charge, we'll be happy to do it," they replied.
I was dumbfounded. Perhaps there is a big guy looking out for all of us little people after all...I'll let you know...stay tuned!
Again, miracle of miracles...the Honda Folks made good on all their promises. Yesterday I went by and the body molding guy was there and the dent guy was there...they went to work and within' an hour had the new heap spruced and protected. The dent guy, Mike had even fixed a couple of tiny "blemishes" I hadn't even seen.
Best of all: the entire episode and work was N/C (no charge).
So, all in all, even tho it took a while to work out everything, I have to say that Carlo, (my sales guy) and Honda Windward came through 100%.
Mike Jones of Dent Away, Hawaii's Premium Paintless Dent Repair is a magician!
Jeff Tario, of Protint Hawaii Inc., who did the moulding is also quite an artisan.
Because both of them did such a cool job...I spoke with both guys and they have both agreed to let me list them here and offer 10% off on any work that they might do for you.
To take advantage of these 10% off offers, please let them know that you saw their business cards on the H-4 when you call. Both guys can travel to your car at work or home and take care of your needs.
Mahalo Nui Loa to Carlo, Mike and Jeffrey!
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Total Mobile Service: Pager 549-DENT.
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Phone: 808-845-9624 Fax: 808-841-1580 Pager: 641-7942
Tinting and Body Moulding Services: Contractor License #CT 19341
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